Wasn't something supposed to happen today...?

Here it is...my "official" due date. I've decided that I will never again focus on a "due date" nor will I be telling anyone what the "date" is that my baby is supposedly going to arrive on. Way too much stress and pressure focused on this one day. Not to mention how frustrating it is to just watch it come and go like any other day...and to still be pregnant on the other side of it. Perhaps I'll just tell people an approximate month...or maybe the month AFTER she's actually due? And, maybe if I say it enough, I'll even trick myself! That would be nice...

I think the hardest part of being pregnant is having absolutely no control over the situation. The biggest event of my life is staring me in the face and I don't even know when (and I'm starting to wonder IF) it's ever going to happen. As for not letting anyone on the date - to avoid the "is that baby STILL in there" statements - I think, at least with this one, I'd have been able to get away with no one suspecting her coming any time soon. All I hear from people when they see me is how "small" I am for being full term. Of course I'm really not small, she's just low and so I look smaller than I would if I were carrying her high.

Anyways...this past month has just been the hardest (excluding week 7-13) because of the lack of stimulation in my life. I'm used to working at least part time, going to school full time and training for some upcoming run or bike race, etc. Now, here I sit, day after day, with nothing to do. My only saving grace is the 3-5 miles I walk every evening. I think maybe today, I'll go waste some time at the library...